When I walk into a room to work with a group, I can usually tell within the first 5 to 10 minutes how solid the outcomes will be, and how tangible we'll be able to make them, simply by how people are showing up in that room. (Truth be told I get a sense of this way before the meeting just in the way the hosts set intentions and plan for it.)
When I have a conversation with someone about something they want to "make real" or change, I can tell within the first 5-10 minutes how likely they're going to be able to do it. (Truth be told, I get a sense of this even before the conversation unfolds by the language they're using and their body language.)
Fortunately, just because we start here, doesn't mean we have to end here. Meetings, conversations, and your chances for success in creating outcomes can shift in the moment. But you have to know where you're at, you have to decide, and you have to show up.
So... How do you show up? How does it impact your leadership? Your relationships? Your results? Your joy?
Several factors play into showing up--I'll be playing with them throughout in this column. For now, let's just run with some basics.
One of the first things I look at in showing up is "presence". Not just stage presence, or meditative presence--full presence: mental, physical, existential, and more. For example, are you present in the moment? Is your body language and energy congruent with what you say you want and will do? Are you present to what's real and here now in your life; to your current reality? Do you hold self-accountability for your results and making things happen? Are you grounded in YOUR space, or are you externally focused, hooked into what everyone else is thinking and doing; hoping or waiting for others to change so you can make your thing happen?
For that meeting, does your team show up present in the room, ready to roll, on time, with an energy of ownership, accountability, and collaboration for what's about to be created? (This is often obvious from minute one of a meeting.) Do you have a clean agenda? Is the container for quality set ahead of time? Or do people trickle in, distracted, hanging out on their phones, exhibiting facial presence and posture that hurts vs. serves, flying by the seat of their pants on agenda and outcomes? Again, within 5 minutes you can tell the quality of a meeting and any outcomes that will come out of it.
If you're finding you and or your team are not getting what you want, and you're a nay to any of these, your solutions are likely in these questions.
It all boils down to showing up.
How you show up in a meeting sets the tone for your organizational outcomes. How you show up in your life sets the tone for the quality of your life. How you show up for your relationships, sets the quality of your relationships. And how you show up for yourself, is the foundation for all of it.
Not to hammer showing up--this is the only time I will--but really, it's that simple.
It's a choice. It's one of your greatest super powers, and it is yours for the taking....
I find there are five essential components to doing this well, and you drive all of them:
Want powerful results? How will you have to show up to make them happen? Want that client? How will you need to show up to get them and have them feel truly cherished? Want a better relationship with your team/spouse/partner/kid? How will you have to show up? Want an awesome culture? How will you all have to show up? Not feeling great about where you are in your life? Show Up.
It's that simple. (Until it's not.)
So how are you showing up? Find the gaps, set your intentions, step in, and go.
//This article originally appeared on Inc.com December 8, 2014