My client “George” wanted to become a better leader. Specifically? He wanted a stronger leadership presence with his team, he wanted to be known as someone people could trust, and he wanted to make partner the following year. Personally, he wanted to be a dad his kids knew was available for them, a husband his wife could lean into, and a bit of space for himself to do the stuff he loved.
My client “George” wanted to become a better leader. Specifically? He wanted a stronger leadership presence with his team, he wanted to be known as someone people could trust, and he wanted to make partner the following year. Personally, he wanted to be a dad his kids knew was available for them, a husband his wife could lean into, and have a bit of space for himself to do the stuff he loved.
Not a bad wish list. All do-able.
For our first three meetings, he showed up late, tired, and often both.
Each time he’d share a worthy list of reasons why, his apologies (for being late, not getting his work done in between, or both), and a promise to do it better next time…
And then he’d be late. And tired.
Now, this guy is brilliant, big-hearted, and a good leader, husband, dad, and human. But he wants to be better, and he — up until this point — couldn’t figure out what was getting in his way. As is often the case when we are getting in our own way and standing right in it, he couldn’t see it, yet.
The last time he showed up late and tired, full of reasons and feeling terrible, I asked him, “George, how can you expect to command the trust and devotion of the people in your life if you can’t honor your own promises with yourself? How can you be someone to lean in to, if you can’t count on yourself to show up? How can you have the level of leadership presence you desire, if you are constantly exhausted? You being tired and late for me is not what it’s about, you are tired and late for you. You’re not honoring your agreements with yourself. I’d love to explore your relationship with ‘personal impeccability’.”
George was never late again for our sessions… Tired? Sure. But for different reasons.
When people come to me or this work they’re often looking for a number of things:
We dig in. We look at what they’re up to. We evaluate the situation.
Most of all we breathe.
See, they're often looking for the magic skill, the “thing” that is going to solve it all, make the pain go away, change them. Be it an app, a book, a program, a skill, anything… what is it that will help them change whatever it is that brought them to the work originally?
They’re often surprised, disappointed, and liberated all at the same time to find that really… the secret sauce to address all the above is closer than they realize.
That sauce?
Them.
They’re the answer they’re looking for. And it’s likely simpler — at first — than they think. (The harder and more complex stuff will come with “doing the work” to change it all.)
But the simple easy part? It’s them; their breathing, their intentions, their energy, their presence, AND their personal integrity and impeccability.
What’s happening around them; the people, the circumstances, the office politics, chaos, tragedy, etc. is really out of their control. (Darn.)
But what’s happening within them; their breath, presence, and impeccability? Well… that it totally within their control.
So we start there… looking at our personal level of presence, purpose, and personal impeccability.
How do we show up for ourselves, so that we can also show up for others?
That is the question.
The better I take care of myself — the more I have for others.
The more present I am — the more I know what to do, and the more others will feel me with them.
The more connected I am to purpose — the more clear I am in my intentions, my why, and my energy for leadership. And the more others will trust me, be inspired by me, and want to follow me.
The more impeccable I am with myself and the more I trust myself — the more trustworthy I become, and the more others will feel it, respond to it, and proceed accordingly.
So I have to start with me.
My own impeccability.
Be who I say I am. Do what I say I’ll do.
Build my own relationship with myself so that I TRUST myself.
Be trustworthy for others.
Do my work.
And from here, I can figure out how to navigate all those things outside myself.
Discover your "secret sauce" in Project Impeccable, starting December 3rd (register by November 26th to ensure you receive your goodies before the 3rd).