Years ago when my ex-husband and I completed our marriage, to keep things extra clean and as emotionally easy as possible, we worked with a mediator. Heading into that first mediation session we both knew what we knew. Our intentions were clear, our energy was clean, and we were present to the situation at hand and how we wanted to be with each other and for our kids. We went into the first mediation session, each of us with a Post-It detailing what we wanted our division of assets and agreements to look like. Four months (and a lot of cash) later, we walked out with almost exactly what was on those Post-Its. Having the mediator helped us with the paperwork and navigating some of CA's divorce laws, AND, we knew what we knew going in.
When the pandemic hit last year and everything got turned upside down, I spent 10 months experimenting, talking with people, interviewing old/current/prospective clients, creating multiple programs and offerings to "meet the moment," playing with price points, and sending my team running in many different directions. In the end, lots of time, energy, money, and team bandwidth later, my team and I looked at my original map -- the map of what I'd sensed would ultimately be most helpful to people (and had actually drawn and posted on my wall) -- and after several summersaults, heart-to-hearts, and refinement, we ultimately went back to my original sense. I'm super grateful for this experience, it gave us so much good -- AND, I knew what I knew.
That hire that you make, that person that you date, that event that you say "yes" or "no" to, that decision that you make that feels "off" or "forced," the thing you want but are afraid to claim... ultimately you know what you know.
There's a difference between trusting yourself, staying rooted, AND getting feedback to support logistics and next steps, VS. hearing that little voice or sense or KNOWING inside you, feeling scrambled, and looking for external validation to tell you what to do that ultimately you already know.
Sometimes you just gotta stop, breathe, get quiet, and trust that you know what you know...
Try it on: What are you pretending not to know? Where might you be looking outside yourself for answers? Where do you want/need to get quiet? If you pretended to know... what would you know?