You're an awesome person. A great leader. A fantastic collaborator. Super smart... Fabulous. You use your time well. Lead your energy. And manage your money with intention and rigor... Wonderful. You want to do more good work. Have even better relationships. Be more inspiring. Attract more meaningful partnerships into your life... Lovely. How's it going?
At the end of the day, business boils down to people, showing up well, building really solid partnerships and structures, doing good work, and amplifying relationship equity. Intentions for all of the above will help get you there, but in order to build big relationship equity (that will support all your business goals), there is more you can "be" and "do" to create it.
Here are 5 ways to make your relationships stronger, cleaner, and more productive as well as make you an even more compelling friend, colleague, or team member to be around.
1. Be present. I think of presence in a relationship in a couple of ways; presence to the current state and health of the relationship, as well as being present to the person right there in front of you in this very moment and this very conversation. Presence is free, ROI is high, and it's essential to know where you're at NOW so you can get where you want to go NEXT. One of the greatest things you can give a person is your full attention and presence. Bonus: It doesn't take more time to be present (it actually saves you time).
2. Take 100% responsibility for the success of this relationship. Sometimes people "wait" to see how someone else will show up in the relationship before they decide if they're in or they're out. That's one way to do it. Another? Don't wait. Go for it. If you want this relationship to grow and be a healthy contribution to your life, their life, and whatever you're working on together, lean in first. If they don't lean back in, you may make other decisions, but if you want to give your relationship a head start-- show up first.
3. Tell the truth. No matter how tough the feedback, how challenging the conversation, how difficult the truth (and I say truth with a little "t" because remember, it's just your truth--not necessarily theirs), tell the truth. Some of the strongest relationships are built off of difficult conversations that happened when someone was willing to take the courageous path of telling their truth. Honest feedback (done with intention and thoughtfulness) creates more space for growth and truth. "Staying at the table" to work through a tricky issue creates trust and intimacy. It all works together. Tell the truth.
4. Decide and choose with intention. The current state of your life and relationships today have been highly influenced by the decisions and choices you've made to this point. Do your decisions and choices support you in creating strong relationships? In moving towards your vision? In showing up well? In becoming the person you want to become? Decide and choose intentionally.
5. Assume good. It's a valuable moment when we realize that we're always creating responsiveness or resistance in our relationships. One of the quickest ways to create responsiveness is to assume good and get curious versus assuming negative intent and jumping to conclusions. Pondering, "There must be a positive intention in all of this? What might it be?" opens up more space to step into the next level of communication together. Assume good.
These are just 5 things to play with in the land of "doing" and "being" to build stronger relationships. Used with positive intent, these become personal Super Powers. There are so many more. What else would you add?
This article Originally appeared on Inc.com July 6, 2015